If there’s one thing I’ve learned over the last 5 years, it’s that leaders make good targets. I don’t know if it’s because our every move is microscopically scrutinized or just that we’re out in front of everyone else, but leading is not for the faint of heart. In fact, I can testify from personal experience that the single most disheartening and discouraging element of leadership is being wounded by “friendly fire”. There have been several times over the last few years that I’ve questioned my career choice and even thought about finding a new job, and I can honestly say that every time it was because of something a “brother” or “sister” in Christ said “in love and concern”.
In fact, I recently heard Ed Young say that your most staunch supporters often become your most ardent detractors. The more someone swears allegiance to you, the more you should watch your back. I’ve seen traces of this already, and you’ve got to admit that it sounds just strange enough to be true.
I recently read some interesting posts here and here and also here by Perry Noble, a pastor (NewSpring Church) who apparently still deals with similar issues frequently. NewSpring has grown in 10 years from a handful of people to over 10,000 and has a pretty amazing story. While it’s refreshing to see that I’m not the only one who struggles with this, it’s also enlightening. If the pastor of a church that size still deals with it then it probably isn’t going away any time soon. So I need to learn to deal now. And I think the best thing I can do is – nothing. Ignore it. Let their ridiculous comments hang by themselves and allow people to see how unfounded the accusations are. Or better yet, stay so busy that you don’t have time to acknowledge the idiots who are more concerned with tearing down than with building up.
To borrow another line from Ed: “Swim with the swimmers – not with the bottom feeders.” That’s pretty good advice, so from now on it’s my mantra. Because it’s tough to climb mountains while you’re swatting at gnats…
My Nana always said you cant soar with eagles if your hanging out with buzzards. I dont think this is what your talking about nonetheless my Nana was awesome like this quote.
p.s. The rumor about you doing #2 in the ladies restroom was started by me. I love you Friend!
I think that any leadership role is going to be enormously complex and challenging because so many people are looking to you for guidance and at the same time expecting you to meet their needs. And it’s impossible to make everyone happy. All you can do is listen to their concerns and pray about it and do what you think that God wants you to do. That is if they have a problem with the church or the way something is done. If it’s a personal attack on you, then you have to just ignore it and let it go and not let thier comments effect/affect you or give them any more weight than they deserve. I’ll be prayin for ya.
I think you said it best – pray and do what GOD wants you to do. We should constantly be asking “God, am I being faithful to what you’ve called me to do?” We can only please one person at a time, so we need to make sure the ‘one’ we’re pleasing is God. All too often, others are too busy being conerned with what THEY want to be concerned with what GOD wants.
And where this gets really interesting is when they learn to disguise a personal attack as a ‘concern’ with the church. Those are always fun…